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How Your Best Life Is Actually Lived in the Average

We think of what our best lives would look like and we envision the trips and the houses or the cars or the big experiences or the relationships. It’s normally the big milestone events. We’re always looking out in the future for the next big thing that will just be incredible.


There is nothing wrong with having dreams and destinations in mind. We have to know where we are headed, after all, if we’re ever going to get there. But, as the saying goes, life is all about the journey not the destination.


As I see it, our best life is actually lived in our averages.


Our average days. Our average highs. Our average experiences, relationships, average level of health and fitness. Our average energy. Our average excitement. Our average interests. Simply our average days.


It is those average days, our every day that we will live day in and day out. Those days are what we experience on the regular.


happy fulfilled looking woman with a hat and straw purse out for a walk living her best life
Your best life is actually lived in the average—and that's a good thing!


Most Poeple Spend 96% of Their Time in Monotony

According to a study by Statista.com around a third of Americans take two to three vacations per year, while just over a quarter of Americans have not traveled at all for non-business related trips in the last year. And, those “vacations” may only be 1-2 overnights, with only some being a week long, over the course of an entire year.


That would be anywhere from zero to two or four to perhaps 14 days on the high side for most Americans to actually live their best versions of life in each year.


Even on the high side, that is 14 out of 365 days in a year.


That’s less than 4% of your life that would be exciting, interesting, relaxing, beautiful, connected, new, inspiring.


That means 96% of your life is boring, mundane, normal, everyday life!


Even if you took 4 weeks of vacation every single year, that’s less than 8% of your entire life.


I don’t know about you, but 4% or even 8% doesn’t feel like my best life.


I’d rather go with the 96% of my life being incredible. Being full of interest and intrigue, beauty, deep connections, energy, new experiences, growth and rewards.


And, the only way that happens is if we flip the idea of vacation on its head. Make our everyday so delightful, so enjoyable, interesting and inspiring that a trip has to be really good and enticing to pull us away from our everyday.


It’s when we elevate our everyday in small sustainable steps that we continue to raise our baseline. That we raise our very average days from existing to thriving every day. Not just a few times of the year.


Good news is there are simple ways we can increase our baselines and live out our very best lives every day as our average.



The Problem is Most People’s Average Days are Not Something You’d Consider Your Best Life.

Most people’s average days are monotonous and people simply don’t know how to up level or elevate them.


In fact, most people never even consider they have a choice. They simply accept this is their life, which is why they dream about their vacations.


So life becomes like the movie, Groundhog Day, where you just experience the same things day in and day out. And continue to dream about a better life somewhere in the future, somewhere else, with someone else, doing something else.


If you can figure out a way to add more interest and intrigue to your every day, to add more health and energy and vitality to your average days— To add more excitement to a Monday.


Your entire life would be transformed just by living average days every day. It becomes your new baseline for living—your new average.



I Know What You’re Thinking:

  • My life is simply boring

  • You don’t know my problems

  • I don’t have the money

  • I don’t have the time

  • I don’t have access to what I want to do

  • I don’t know how to add more interest or intrigue to my life



I was that person once. To an extreme actually

I had the businesses, the wealth, the house, the cars, the stuff, the marriage, the trips—all of it.


I still found myself bored and uninspired and didn’t know what to do about it.


I thought the answer was out there in the world somewhere. Experiencing new things—that’s where the interest and intrigue would be.


It would take me years to realize I could create more interest and intrigue and excitement and fulfillment by simply shifting a few tiny perceptions and ways of doing things right at home.


The thing is, a trip or thing or experience is not going to last. It is fleeting.


Today, years later, with many tools under my belt, I have created a fulfilled life no matter where I am and it’s lived out in the most average of my days.


Days without the money, the things, the house, the marriage, the businesses or the trips. No, just my very average days.


I have created a new baseline for living that affords these no matter where I am or what my circumstances.


And what a great starting point for the everyday it has been!



Here’s How I Do It and How You Can too.


The easiest way to do this for yourself is by having a strategy for your life.


Know what lights you up, what you find interesting and intriguing.


Know the areas you would like to improve to be a better version of yourself whether that’s eating for health or being fit in a simple way.


Know your purpose and your why behind your motivations and desires.

Know your values and ensure they are guiding your life.


Know how you want to show up in the world.


What is beautiful in life to you?


What type of conversations do you want to have?


Then, look at your life and find the smallest everyday swaps you can make to start to change your baseline. To up-level and elevate your everyday living. To make your average days beautiful and interesting and full of energy and connection.


Take time for yourself each day to master your plan. Rinse and repeat.


With only one small change you will have already raised your baseline and your everyday life will be one step closer to your dream life.


In a future letter, we’ll dive deeper into exactly what that might look like and how to accomplish this in your own life.


Alright my friends, that’s it for today. Ponder this and take some action.

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